Homestretch!

Finally - the last week of yoga!

Friday was my first day back to class, post-op. It was pretty awful. I felt super hot (it WAS mid-heat wave), super nauseous (I DID have hole in my head) and super miserable (wah!) Saturday wasn't much better - I opted for a back-to-back double to catch up on one of the two classes I missed last week. The double wasn't terrible... I was just fatigued during the second class. And Alan corrected my Standing Head To Knee, saying I needed to ground my standing leg more before I kick out. But I just finally started kicking out, Heidi said I was ready! Frustrating... We lost power Saturday night, which means I had one too many beers out of boredom and felt slightly hung over in class Sunday. And for some reason could no longer balance on one leg as I was uber concerned about the previous day's grounding issue.

Bad. Yoga. Weekend!

Monday and Tuesday were much better! I feel strong. I'm working on my standing, locked knee. I'm in the homestretch!

This is a good time to describe exactly what I’m doing during each 90 min class. Let me lay it out for you.

Every pose, we do two times.

The first chunk of class is what I think of as the Warm Up - there's a breathing exercise, Half Moon pose (side-to-side, front-to-back stretches), Awkward (leg warm up) and Eagle (twisty arms & legs). This isn't the MOST difficult part of class, but probably second-most. You're getting used to the heat, seeing how flexible your body is today, seeing how the food you ate or the water you didn't drink yesterday is going to hit you today... It takes about 25 mins - almost a third of class! - and afterwards, we get a drink of water.

Chunk #2 is the balancing-on-one-leg series. There are 3 poses: the aforementioned and dreaded Standing Head To Knee (which is what it sounds like - stand on one leg, LOCK YOUR KNEE!, bend your other leg up while holding the foot, kick it out keeping your standing leg absolutely locked... and eventually, when both legs are straight and locked out solid, you lower your forehead to your knee. One day...) Next is Standing Bow pose - I've finally figured out how to stay in this (almost) the full time! Finally, Balancing Stick pose - one leg, hands clasped overhead, hinge at the waste, you should look like a T as in Tom. This one is tough; I'm usually really winded after it, def gets your heart rate up. “Mini heart attack in the room so you don’t have one in real life.” And it's only 10 seconds!

The 3rd chunk is the one I both welcome and dread. I think of it as the Hip Series. In all three poses, we straddle the mat. The first one we stretch our hamstrings and hips and attempt to touch our forehead to the mat between our legs. I used to be able to do this; now I can't. Heidi says it's because my body is changing and shifting; some things I do better, others worse. Then... the dreaded... Triangle pose. I need it, I hate it. Straddle the mat, turn right foot out parallel to the mirror and bend the knee while straightening the left leg and lowering the hips; twist your body so one arm is reaching for the floor and pressing against the bended knee and the other arm is reaching for the ceiling. It hurts! It feels so good! And you do EACH leg TWICE… so it takes forever. They call it the pinnacle of the standing series and it's my first "homestretch" milestone in the class. After triangle, it's a cake walk until we lie down for the floor series. But first - finish off the hip series with Standing-Separate-Leg-Stretching-forehead-MUST-touch-the-knee pose. Sorta feels good- at least you are lowering your heart rate - but mostly I feel like I'm being water boarded by my own sweat spilling from my "costume" into my face.

Last part of the standing series is Tree pose (stand one leg with opposite foot on hip; insert “grounding” issue here) and Toe pose (one leg, bend down, balance on your toes and fingertips.) One set each, woohoo!

Ah, sweet relief! The standing series is over and I can lie down! It's the second "homestretch" milestone! Plus we're now about 2/3 done with class!! The only thing that can take away my pleasure is the unavoidable chirping from the teacher that “the warm up is over, and the real yoga will now begin.” The REAL YOGA! What have I been doing for the last 50 minutes?!

We get a 2 minute rest, but it's also a pose: Savasana, dead body pose. Don't move. Easy. Then, Wind Removing pose. Easy. Stretch legs to stomach, good for digestion and hopefully removing wind OUTSIDE of class...

I already said we do each posture twice. Now that we're on the floor, we also take a 20 second savasana between each set of each pose. So it goes slower but much more relaxed, deeper, etc. The "real yoga", one might say.

After Wind Removing pose, and in between each posture that we're laying on our backs, we do a full-body sit up that ends with our foreheads - you guessed it! - on our knees. This is warming up our hammies for *teaser alert!* the last Stretching pose.

We then flip to our bellies for Floor Chunk #1 - the Spine Strengthening Series. There are 4 poses where we bend backwards and use our spine strength to support us. The second of the four poses is a nightmare - you tuck your straight arms under your body, palms down. It doesn't hurt my elbows anymore but the pressure on my stomach is not pleasant. I'm not saying that I've ever truly barfed in yoga, because I haven't, but if I've ever, oh I don't know, thrown up in my mouth just a little, it was during this pose.

Twenty minutes later we are DONE strengthening our spines. Off our bellies = time for a quick sip of water. Third “homestretch” milestone reach! Twenty minutes left! I think of the last and final chunk of poses as the stretching part. The first two postures are super easy - another backbend, lying back to stretch thighs and hips followed by a forward bend that's pretty much like child pose, only the teacher is yelling at us to strrrretttcchh our arms out as far as possible until our shoulders hurt. Evidently this is supposed to release stress in our shoulders. Almost as dubious a claim as it's as relaxing and restorative as eight hours of sleep. Someone is strrrretttcchhing the truth!

Now. Before Milestone # 4 is another massive hurdle. It's the Triangle of the floor series (in that I dread it and need it; that's where the similarities end). CAMEL. The deepest back bend of the day. Kneel. Knees 6 inches apart. Put your hands on your hips. Push hips forward. Drop your head back. Slide your hands from your hips to your heels. Push your hips forward, lean back.... Being that we are so used to slouching forward on computers, driving, etc. our bodies are not used to this extreme stretch on our front side. Evidently a lot of emotions are stored there, so it's not uncommon for people to feel truly weird before, during and/or after this posture. You may want to laugh, cry, puke, you name it. Repeat again, but with a little more space between your knees.

Once you get past camel, you are in the REAL homestretch. In the span of my 30 day challenge, I feel like this past weekend was Camel and now I'm in the homestretch!

What's next...

Rabbit pose - deepest forward bend of class, counteracts Camel, more water boarding.

Separate leg stretching - stretch left and right, forehead to knee, straighten your leg, heel off floor. Then put legs forward, do a quick sit up, grab your big toes and pull forward. This is the deepest stretch to your hamstrings, which I lovelovelove and needneedneed.

Then - spine twist. And we only one set!

Almost there! One more breathing exercise. Exhale all the toxins out of your body and learn to embrace the Buddha belly!

There is a final Savasana after the last breathing exercise. We are encouraged to stay and rest for two minutes, letting our bodies absorb all the hard work and start the healing process. Ahh....

Namaste.